i was listening to my favorite radio show while driving the other day (for the record it's Coast To Coast AM, they talk about psychic stuff, conspiracies, ghosts, demons, o.b.e.'s, near death experiences, bigfoot, 2012, 11 11, alternate histories of jesus, etc.) www.coasttocoastam.com
this particular show was about a philosophical priest that had performed over 10,ooo exorcisms. one day he was holding an exorcism seminar at a church, halfway through his speech a man jumped up out of the crowd and ran towards him spewing obscenities and blasphemy and threatened to kill said priest.
when talking about the exorcism that immediately occurred (on audio tape, mind you) after said incident, the priest began rattling off strange facts about the demonic victim: "Kevin" apparently Kevin was once part of a popular singing group from the early 90's... now the priest being an older gentleman had no idea of the cultural significance of this group, whose name he struggled with for a while, but finally it was revealed... Kevin was a part of Color Me Badd and their song was titled "I Wanna Sex U Up." then they played the tape... a demonic voice (emanating from Kevin) began screaming: "HE'S MINE I OWN HIM BLAH BLAH BLAH GURRRGGGLLEEE RAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!"
i almost crashed my car.
Now Brian from CMB is apparently on a new boy band reality show and drinks a lot of wine and the George Michael lookin' dude is a father and tire store owner and the Kenny G. lookin' dude is a cokehead (according to my Google research).
I'm friends with Kevin on Myspace, he makes gospel music now.
(just so there is no confusion, the man is still alive and well)
i stole this post of of the "strivin'" blog, but i feel like it really represents the spirit of the man who has always had my back since day one in the bay area music scene (and the backs of many others, he was on 11/5's classic debut album and was also the first person to play e-40 on the radio) if you really want to know about the history of bay area hip hop, you can't overlook my man billy jam...music activist, irish born b-boy, all around awesome dude... a recent new york transplant, billy does a show on wfmu http://www.wfmu.org/playlists/BJ and writes for countless publications and blogs word
Classic Letter-Billy Jam's Open Letter To 106.1 KMEL's Program Director Letter by Billy Jam...
This letter originally appeared in Issue 2 of Strivin' magazine. This shit is classic and made a little bit of a buzz around the local music industry because it was a straight shot to KMEL's program director at the time, Michelle Santosousso. These days KMEL is playing a lot more Bay Area rap and that's great. I have no actual proof of this since I haven't turned on the radio (besides talk radio) in the past nine years, but from what people are telling me, the Bay is finally getting a little recognition from the powerhouse station. To understand this letter you have to know that around the time of its publication (1997), KMEL had all but abandoned local music. They were calling themselves the "The People's Station" and "The Station For The Hip Hop Generation," but were actually far from it.
On to the letter...
Dear Ms. Santosousso,
I am writing you this open letter since you didn't have the professional courtest to return any of my last four phone calls over the past six months for stories I was writing for numerous publications read by many of the "people" that "The People's Station" targets. Hopefully you will see this letter in Strivin'. However, based upon your format, which pretty much ignores the Bay Area's rich rap/hip hop talent, I doubt that you spend much time reading Bay Area rapzines or even listening to much music from the Bay. If you did you would no doubt realize how incredible most of it is and immediately have in heavy rotation the endless radio-worthy Bay Area artists in place of your current biased playlist.
In case you think this letter is an attack on KMEL's staff or on you as a person, it is not. Firstly, I have no beef with anyone on KMEL's staff. Many, including Davey D, Sway and Chuy Gomez are respected and valued friends. In fact, I got fired from Wild 107 a few years ago when, after calling in on KMEL to congratulate Chuy (a former Wild 107 DJ) on his new gig, my program director kicked me out of the station for going on the "competitor's" airwaves. I could have kept the job if I had apologized to him and disowned Chuy as a friend. I didn't.
Regarding you Ms. Santosousso, since I've never had the opportunity to talk to you, I don't even know you and therefore have no opinions about you as a person. However, I do have many strong opinions, many negative, about your programming decisions. The first of these was when, after a backstage problem at a KMEL Summer Jam a few years ago, you decided to ban all of Too $hort's music. Then you justified this blackball move with a statement made to the San Francisco Chronicle about how Too $hort hadn't had a hit in two years anyway! The irony of this story is that a year into the ban Too $hort blew up with the title track of his next and "final" album, Gettin' It, and you had no choice but to recant your decision and program the man's music. Of course you never admitted your mistake nor apologized to Too $hort, the godfather of Bay Area rap. And when $hort was interviewed live on KMEL he was a true gentleman and professional so he didn't bring it up. Comically though, the album that you helped him promote on your airwaves still had his side of the story including that famous and ultimately prophetic line from "That's Why," "fuck all of that blackball shit / It won't last / KMEL, y'all can kiss my ass."
Now I could go on with more examples of your questionable programming decisions, but I don't have enough space so I'll jump up to the present or rather to March 14th, 1997, the day that "The People's Station" underwent its recent image makeover. At 6:00 PM the new format was introduced by a rap freestyle that falsely promised, "Regardless of the time of day / All you're gonna hear play is hip hop," and then we were told that KMEL is "The Station For The Hip Hop Generation." This slogan, which has been driven into the ground every single mic break since then, is not only misleading and insulting to your listener's intelligence, but it is also totally disrespectful to the artform of hip hop. Having the voice of KRS-1 telling us that this is the sound of "the hip hop generation" wedged between a cheesy jingle for Levitz Furniture and a sappy Mint Condition ballad is not hip hop by any means! It seems to you that "the hip hop generation" is interchangeable with "the Pepsi generation."
But it gets worse. It appears, in light of the 2Pac and Biggie murders, you've upped your "no color lines" and "increase the peace" type slogans. Don't get me wrong, "Street Soldiers" and "Street Knowledge" are highly commendable shows. So is Sway when, on March 21st, he had former gang members and peace activist Pastor Sonny on his show dropping knowledge about putting an end to gang violence in our community. However, when the very next DJ comes on and plays (from your playlist) the gangsta athem, "Gangstas Make The World Go Round," you totally diffuse your supposed stand for peace. But then I wouldn't expect much more from a programmer who in a sampled evening hour's format (March 27th, 6:00 to 7:00 PM) of music for "the hip hop generation" plays, out of twelve songs, six R&B cuts and out of the six rap/hip hop songs only one was local and that was the multi-platinum 2Pac.
So Ms. Santosousso, how come "The People's Station" doesn't give much love to the "people" of the Bay Area? Why doesn't your "hip hop" daily playlist include such super talented hip hoppers as Saafir and the Hobo Junction family, Rasco, DJ Shadow, Lateef and Lyrics born and the SoleSides crew (and not just as background music!!!!), Homeliss Derelix, Invisibl Skratch Piklz including Mixmaster Mike or Q-Bert with Dr. Octagon, Bored Stiff, Mystik Journeymen, Hieroglyphics, etc., etc.? And since you're playing the self-described "gangsta" music of Westside Connection, why don't you play the unlimited supply of popular local reality rappers like C-Bo, B-Legit, 11/5, Mac Dre, Cougnut, The Delinquents, Andre Nickatina, GLP, RBL Posse and the classic 415, etc., etc.? And tell me, why didn't KMEL add The Conscious Daughters' killer 1996 single, "Gamers," or the Whoridas' incredible single, "Shot Callin' & Big Ballin'" which even The Beat, your sister station in LA added?
Based on your past record I don't expect you to reply this time, but if anyone reading this happens to be calling, writing or e-mailing KMEL's programming office, please join me in asking that they cease and desist pimping the words "hip hop" and that they start to act like a real "people's station" and give some love to Bay Area artists.
to begin: dumb = tasty...mmmmmmm mm mmmm mmm mmmmmmmmm. walking to my car this morning, newspaper headline about man sticking his arm in tiger cage...tasty. i figure if you put anything in a tiger cage the tiger will think it's a present and want to keep it, tigers are very fond of gifts, especially if they happened to be "wrapped" in a green or red holiday sweater sleeve.
the level of smarts in this country...
got to work at 11am today, i would normally be behind the scenes at my crappy record store job but everyone called in sick, so now i'm in the hip-hop customer service mode i get a call at noon from a number i don't recognize, block the call, phone rings again, the number looks familiar this time... 831....8..3..1.... it's coming from the phone at my job. i pick it up and say hello, my boss says hello back, then proceeds to ask about my hours for the day, when i can finally make it in because i was needed in the hip-hop section , i tell her i'm standing in the hip-hop section and had been for the past hour.
some guy comes up to me in hip hop and stands next to me, stares, for a while, then asks which living legends album is the best
go to mcdonalds, zone out on the fry machine, it's counting down then starts beeping, the numbers on the readout turn into letters that say: shake. someone comes by and shakes the fries that's how much that company trusts its employees, as this is happening i hear a rustling in front of me, a customer is attempting to grab, attempting to secure a plethora, attempting, of straws to accomidate his family, attempting, i realize he isn't looking at the straws he was attempting to grab, he was staring at a blank wall
the man "goddam" Billy Jam (irish born bay area hip-hop legend, founder of hip-hop slam and recent new york transplant radio activist, check him out fridays on wfmu online... put it in your search engine) asked me for some predictions for the coming year...
here's my bullshit response, love jason.
predictions for 2008 by jasonchavez
the cross cultural fusions happening in popular music will grow so varied that Frankenstein-esque new genres will have to be sewn together in order to describe the newest music like: gothic indie folk, or post-grunge screamo tech, or neuvo-retro contemporary pshycobilly christian , acappella death electro, braille, sunshine blues and every cd will have either a string quartet tribute or a downtempo remix someone in everyone of these band will either have the chin-beard/dreads combo, extreme bedhead/facial grimace combo or will wear a necktie incorrectly
umm... every politician will lie
the people will become fed up with the structure of wealth in this country and simultaneously dismantle the i.r.s and the d.p.t.
every reality dating show that is intended to end in marraige will go for 1-2 new seasons and fear factor will introduce baby eating
food will become more processed and multi-functional
lonely and or socio-pathic people will be able to purchase robot mates
you'll be ably to rent your personal memories from netflix
society at large will realize that all of the celebrities that are featured in tabloids and on entertainment tonight-esque "news" shows are really unattractive/boring/not-so-smart and will focus on bettering their own lives, homes families and building intimacy with the people they chose to be their partners/mates
a famous musician will pass away and everyone will rush out to buy their entire catalog
i will eat lots of pizza and watch the young ones and golden girls on dvd with my boo.
the parking in this city is insane... duh, like a bad sci-fi novel, the tyranny is obvious, immediate and accepted (because it is impossible to win a dispute with people who can "legally" hold your car for ransom). so i get a ticket this morning for residential parking, i was half expecting one, since the "rule" is 2-hour parking limit in residential areas starting at 8a.m. i'm not going to pretend that i was up bright and early this morning moving my car in order to avoid a citation... anyway, i pick up the ticket and notice that the time the ticket was issued was 9:45 a.m. yet, i should "legally" be allowed to park until 10 a.m., then it's game on they didn't have the common decency to wait 15 minutes to issue my citation, they didn't even respectfully lie to me, now i'm out another $50 and face the possibility of my car being "booted" and possibly towed while i sleep
someone told me that they got a ticket for street cleaning once, but it wasn't the day that cleaning was scheduled, instead, the dpt agent dated the ticket for the previous day in order to issue it...
ATTENTION: IF YOU INTEND TO SEE THIS FILM AND DON'T WANT ANY OF IT RUINED DO NOT READ THIS POST!!!! SPOILER ALERT!!! SPOILER ALERT!!! SPOILER ALERT!!! okay, being a fan of the franchise i watched a bootleg of saw iv on the net last night...more of the same but engaging and quite good, the poor man's seven if you will...
however, this installment of the series is the closest in kinship to the great prop comic Gallagher then any of its predecessors.
Gallagher's act is basically: philosophy philosophy philosophy smash a freakin' melon...
saw iv: philosophy philosophy philosophy smash a freakin' melon...
it was a left turn i was not expecting and the fact that it happened to Donnie Wahlberg was just that much sweeter...
and fred savage,the wizard, and some little girl were running into universal studios to attend the gigantic nintendo competition. i noticed one of the extras was a guy dressed up in a cartoon character suit, it looked kinda like mickey mouse with a different head. after rewinding it a couple of times i also noticed a child squealing out an excited "andy panda!". don't you guys think that he looks like mickey mouse? i do. this isn't coming to the point that the lesser known andy panda came before mickey mouse, i just wanted to spread awareness of his existence. and now for something completely different
a customer came up to me at MY RECORD STORE JOB (where i labor in the hip-hop section) and asked me if i worked there
i made the mistake of making a joke
i said "either that or i have OCD"
she then proceeded to tell me about her friend who has OCD, ADD and a myriad of other ailments who gets SSI (lots of initials) who came to her house the other day to watch a half hour program on television
i asked if her friend cleaned the house for her
she said no and that her friend had given her bedbugs
i inched away a tiny bit
then she told me that she hadn't been to my place of work since it was a bowling alley, "that was a while ago," i remarked...then she told me her family history and that she had the honor of getting the clap from the main LSD kingpin of haight-ashbury era san francisco, seems she was reguarded as a weiro untill kids started tripping and then she was just the coolest
i asked her if she needed any help
she said no
....
the she looked at the bin card for tha pharcyde, apparently the word pharcyde in its misspelling looks a lot like the word scientists use for petrified dinosaur shit and apparently petrified dinosaur shit is infested with colorful minerals...
so i ask "ahhh...so it's colorful"
and she says "yeah, you can chop it up and make jewelry out of it"
so i'm at my crappy record store job when someone pages for "anyone to help line one" they don't say why... so i ask that turdburgler james dillon what the dilly is, he says the call is from a deaf person on relay and those calls usually take a while and he had to answer other calls, i tell him i'll take it, why not, i'm patient (for those who don't know, relay is when you speak through a third party that types out the questions and responses for the deaf party and recites the typed parts to the non-deaf party, sounds simple right?)
here's what happened: deaf guy: do you have the new metallica record? me: i believe so dg: what does it sound like me: (after a brief friendly non threatening chuckle) ummm... i don't know, hard fast rock music? (i've never had to describe metallica before, the idea to me is a bit amusing) dg: i'm sorry i'm an 82 year old deaf person that's never heard metallica, why is that funny me: i wasn't, ummm, i wasn't trying to laugh at...
so then i say to the relay guy who obviously sold me out to a cranky old deaf guy making it look like i was laughing AT him: "just ask if he would like the cd on hold..."
relay guy: you're not allowed to talk to me, you must talk directly to the client
this fucker sells me out, makes me look like a jerk that makes fun of old deaf guys then won't help me at all, plus he's allowed the old guy to believe that i'm a "young lady" the whole length of the conversation.
me: so would you like the cd on hold sir dg: yes young lady, what instruments do the young men play me: ummm...guitar drum and bass for the most part dg: are you still there me: what name would you like the disc under dg: (i won't tell you his name, that's kinda mean) me: the cd will be on hold for you at the front register until tommorrow evening, thanks sir dg: thank you young lady
ran across a cd today of "the best of miami vice" by virtuoso composer Jan Hammer. the back of the disc elaborates on how people aproach Mr. Hammer about scenes from Miami Vice and the great music that accompanies those scenes coupled with inquiries on why the material isn't available on cd...it is now.
IF YOU'RE ON A GIANT BOAT THAT IS SINKING AND EVERY TIME THE BOAT TIPS YOUR BODY HURLS THE ENTIRE LENGTH OF THE MAMMOTH VESSEL SPINNING YOU AGAINST COLD METAL RAILINGS LIKE A HUMAN FUCKING HORSESHOE HOW DO YOU HAVE TIME TO SING OVER YOUR SCREAMS AND BREAKING BONES?
some of the most memorable dmc battles moments that made me want to dj...
dj david from germany, love the t-shirt stuffed into the sweatpants, keep your eyes on his foot, plus the most impressive ending ever:
dj yoshi from japan: embedding is disabled so you're gonna have to paste the link: http://youtube.com/watch?v=zmtf64ivp28 (he scratches with his...well...)
ice-t's dj aladdin (curl alert)
ummm... q-bert... whoa
quite possibly the best battle dj ever... dj craze
i'm really upset i can't find the clip of dj pam from the coup rocking doules with her breasts
and finally, the reaction from the hood (i must say, the best punch line to all of this tomfoolery is the cheesy new age music that accompanies the film)
so i know that this whole 2 girls 1 cup thing has already come and gone, but i saw a reaction video the other day of Darth Vader pukeing through his helmet while watching the video, which was mildly amusing, so i looked up other "reaction videos" because frankly they're funny... for those who don't know, 2 girls 1 cup is a now-legendary piece of fetish pornography involving 2 girls putting things in 1 cup and sharing them, things that only they could produce (i'm assuming, i haven't actually seen the video because i don't enjoy vomiting) anyway, people began filming themselves watching the video and the posting these "reaction videos" for others to watch, which was funny, then it evolved into people being filmed watching the video who had no idea what was in store for them, even funnier, then something strange happened, kids began playing the video for their parents and taping their reactions... to this day i have never sworn in front of my parents, i might have had a beer with my dad once, but i would never show my parents a video of 2 girls doing things that would cause normal people to puke. but i also noticed that in these cross-generational reaction videos that the whole family was laughing and gagging together, as a unit, families have actually bonded through this experience...so i submit to you, family bonding in the new millenium:
The first nuclear explosion in history took place in New Mexico, at the Alamogordo Test Range, on the Jornada del Muerto (Journey of Death) desert, in the test named Trinity. This test was intended to prove the radical new implosion weapon design that had been developed at Los Alamos during the previous year. This design, embodied in the test device called Gadget, involved a new technology that could not be adequately evaluated without a full scale test. The gun-type uranium bomb, in contrast, was certain to be effective and did not merit testing. In addition, since no nuclear explosion had ever occurred on Earth, it seemed advisible that at least one should be set off with careful monitoring to test whether all of the theoretical predictions held. (This has the the original sound so you might want to turn your speakers down.)
This kinda speaks for itself.
The Crossroads Series tests were the first nuclear explosions since World War II, and the first nuclear weapon tests since Trinity. These were the first "weapons effects" tests ever conducted - tests designed specifically to study how nuclear explosions affect other things - rather than tests of the behavior of a weapon design (as was Trinity). The purpose of the tests was to examine the effects of nuclear explosions on naval vessels, planes, and animals.
The next two videos are the largest nuclear weapon ever. The bomb was tested on October 30, 1961, in Novaya Zemlya, an archipelago in the Arctic Sea. Tsar Bomba' (Царь-бомба, literally "Emperor Bomb") is the Western name for the RDS-220 (codenamed "Ivan" by its developers), which was the largest, most powerful nuclear weapon ever detonated. Developed by the Soviet Union, the bomb was originally designed to have a yield of about 100 megatons of TNT, however that was reduced by half in order to limit the amount of nuclear fallout that would result.
some therapy for that ass. hold on a second baby...let's just talk about this? ...now i want you to tell yer girl you love her... ...now ladies it's your turn. everybody hug.
bmbf radio is not on for today... beacause i'm sick... raina is dealing with finals... andrew woke up late and is now stoned and watching graffiti videos... click here and check out last weeks show.
my nominee for silliest homo erotic / 80's workout craze video made by straight people: Olivia Newton-John "Physical" (now go buy Rufus Wainright does Judy Live At Carnegie Hall, it's brilliant)
just a bit of background... my mother's brother was a drag queen, my father's brother was also quite out, plus my best friend since jr. high came out to me years later and one of my best friends at work likes the bears (and i don't mean sports) i know that's kinda like saying; "i'm not racist cause i have black friends" but it is important... in the 80's my uncles were very into the dj scene and i was exposed to artists like Sylvester (her) and the diva periods of many already famous singers like Diana Ross (how many costume changes per show, ummm... every song). What's the point, well, people think it's recenty become hip to be gay or metro, it was never not cool... proof? Diana Ross "Muscles" (written by Michael Jackson) my nominee for the creepiest homo erotic video made by straight people (for further proof just look at the back cover of the 2nd Rockwell album, or any album by Full Force)
so i make a joke at work today during a rousing discussion about b-horror movies: "how come you never hear about anyone being murdered with a jackhammer, i mean, why not go for it"
so as a joke i put "jackhammer murder" into the google search engine... it comes back with a film entitled "The Jackhammer Murders"
the tag words for the film are: jackhammer, lesbian, crystal meth... it just keeps getting deeper, supposedly the film has quite a homo erotic tinge as well, for all of the male characters strip to their underwear at random points in the film, and most are jackhammered through the mouth.
random note: the best Leprechaun film is part 5 which takes place in space, it has lines like: "let's hurry up and do this job so I can get drunk."
however, in part 4 he does smoke weed with Ice-T and in part 1 he kills someone with a pogo stick, then there's the running gag about the guy with the injured leg where he'll run by and hit the guy in the leg and yell: "how's your leg"
i'm a little drunk right now
love jason
Wednesday, December 12, 2007
the greatest commercial ever (it's dutch by the way) the greatest music video ever
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
some of the many wonders of body modification.
Monday, December 10, 2007
i think this is everything i was asked to post about... sunday was intense
tim and eric / tird tim and eric bowl chipmunks real voices...this theme song is intense primordial dwarfism fashion show... good god tyra
http://www.laz-d.com/ this is not a joke, laz d is a rapper with down syndrome, while it is a bit comical it's also very inspiring, plus he makes a hell of a slow jam
i also watched every chapter of r kelly's trapped in the clost in one sitting... it made me a bit dizzy, you can find that shiznoz on your own
my new album with mc dopestyle is #3... whoot whoot
CMJ Hip Hop #1036
TW LW ARTIST ALBUM LABEL 1 1 BUCK 65 Situation Strange Famous 2 10 HANGAR 18 Sweep The Leg Definitive Jux 3 8 DOPESTYLE The Little Happy Daly City 4 3 AESOP ROCK None Shall Pass Definitive Jux 5 2 JUNK SCIENCE Gran Dad's Nerve Tonic Definitive Jux 6 7 SOLE AND THE SKYRIDER BAND Sole And The Skyrider Band Anticon 7 5 EDIT Certified Air Raid Material Alpha Pup 8 19 DJ MUGGS VS SICK JACKEN The Legend Of The Mask And The Assassin Universal Latino 9 6 MAC LETHAL 11:11 Rhymesayers 10 22 PIECES OF PEACE Pieces Of Peace Cali-Tex 11 9 TALIB KWELI Eardrum Warner Bros. 12 13 BLUE SCHOLARS Joe Metro [EP] Massline/Rawkus 13 4 ILLER THAN THEIRS Iller Than Theirs Embedded 14 14 OTHELLO Alive At The Assembly Line HIPHOPISMUSIC 15 11 ROB SONIC Sabotage Gigante Definitive Jux 16 12 COMMON Finding Forever Geffen 17 17 G AND D Message Uni Versa Stones Throw Look 18 21 M.I.A. Kala Interscope 19 40 ANGIE STONE The Art Of Love And War Concord 20 25 YEA BIG AND KID STATIC Yea Big And Kid Static Jib Door
johnny cash and june carter roscoe holcomb (looks like burroughs) elizabeth cotton (she plays her guitar upside down) judy collins (doin' petes song turn, turn, turn) kim loy wong and the highlanders steel band mississippi john hurt Rev. Gary Davis Donovan, Shawn Phillips, and Rev. Gary Davis buffy ste-marie Bessie Jones and Children from the Downtown Community School ramblin' jack elliot
Southern rap would not exist as we know it without UGK (Pimp C. and Bun-B) Pimp C. died of unknown causes in a hotel room monday, he was speculated to have severe emotional and physical issues after being jailed on trumped up charges... he was quite a talented musician and brought a musicality to rap that has yet to be mirrored rest in peace
left to right pimp c. and bun-b (u.g.k. underground kings)
Seriously though...i have'nt asked santa for anything in years....and i think its time dude payed up.Um yeah call me what you want but i'd be bringing this shit to show and tell on the regular.