Tuesday, November 27, 2007

the lamest thing i've ever heard muttered in the hip-hop section

so i work at a record store and help people with hip-hop...blah blah blah (said dracula)

this (white) guy walks in the store with two small girls, well small compared to him...
he has on baggy jeans, an all over print hoodie, sunglasses, headphones (worn over the hood), the hoodie is open exposing a t-shirt bearing a motto in reference to hustling, he has a blinged out skull belt buckle, he begins telling the girls to ask me where to find certain cd's, i'm standing right next to him, so i walk away...

as i'm exiting i hear the dude exclaim in reference to a Baby and Lil' Wayne cd:
"awww, see that, these dudes are hella gay... that makes me want to pull out my shotgun..."


then i realized that he was closeted, and by shotgun he meant penis, because he really felt the urge to pull out his "shotgun" member and blow a big hearty load all over the effigy of two shirtless creamy brown skinned males who obviously have a lot of money and no problem displaying "family affection" for one another"

this epiphany was quickly debunked upon hearing homeskillet freestyling out front about his shotgun and rollin' and hustlin' and being a gangsta...

then i once again realized he was merely satan's bum droppings (not unlike rob thomas from matchbox 20 or santana... more about that later, or the guy from train...)

1 comment:

samit said...

No man. your epihany wasn't debunked in fact it was spot on. His freestlye was reaffirming your initial speculations. You see- he pulls out his shotgun (penis) before rollin' (around in bed the next morning) and ventures out in the streets for more hustlin' (turnin' tricks)

Anyone one says they want to murder homosexuals are just repressed gay suicidals.

btw- hi.